Comments 5

#girltalk: Having Standards

“Are you kidding? I’m paying!” he laughed and took the check.

It was a first date on a regular day. I have known my date for three whole years. So it was not awkward. Nothing like those job interviews with cocktails first date type. Without candlelight in the middle of the table, one cannot even say that it was a date. Actually for me it was not a date; a friendly fine dinning of sort. The D word was put in my mouth by some optimistic, drama addicted girlfriends.

So for the sake of discussion with my girls, let’s call it one.

Whether you realize it or not, one always has their checklist for a date. A list contains with your preferences mixed with a healthy dose of that hope to score a prince charming. Did he make a reservation? Check. Does he open the door? Check. Smart convos? Check. Appropriate outfit? Check. White Flowers? Check.

These kind of preferences sometimes get mixed up with the idea of not being independent. Who need a doorman if you have a boyfriend? I refuse to call that kind of attitude dependent or unemancipated. Having talked with my girls about standards earlier today, we settled that it is a sign of strength. It means you still have choices.

Even though it has never happened, I won’t mind paying for my own meal and wine. But will the date miss one plus point on the list?

“Of course, you don’t want a man who cannot treat you well!” my girls said. “It is not about the money. The reservation means that he cares. The door opening means that he has been raised well. The flowers show that he knows what you like. And so on and so on. It’s a sign of good characters.” one of my girls said.

“And experience!” the other one added. “Well it could be bad news, when it means that he has many girls before you and know what works. However, nowadays we could call ourselves lucky that we know that type of men. Not those good looking types with no manners who just wanna get laid and don’t call you.”

“Yeah it called having standards. S-ta-ndardss! And it is so important. I rather be alone than be with someone who treats me like I’m worthless. That one cosmetic brand does not say “we’re worth it” for nothing!” she said.

“Haha. You people are hilarious. But true. Dating is like a contest among suitable candidates on one point of life; and the winner is the one who has checked all the boxes on the list faster than the others. That person who is smart enough to do so. Oh god, I think we are so mature now. Nothing is based only on looks and smells,” I laughed.

“Soooo, when will he be in town the next time? He need to pass the bar exam in Munich first right?”

“Just ask him when you two will meet! You guys have been friends for years anyway.”

“Not even he’s the last man on earth. I would rather die. Remember what we have said #nomorelongdistance.”

“See. The trill of being chased makes dating fun!”

Have a good one!




  1. Jessi says

    Wunderbarer Post! Monica, ich würde dich so gerne kennenlernen! Wann und wo bist du bald unterwegs?


  2. Kirsten says

    Ich bin ganz deiner Meinung. Es gibt so viele Mädels heutzutage, die keinen Respekt für sich selbst haben. Es ist so Schade!


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